Written in February 2016
I understand that in the society we live in today it’s quite scary to be single and you know, “alone.” Everywhere you go people are either with their significant other or in families. Be it restaurants, weddings, parties. People come at least in pairs. A few years ago when I had gone to a Christmas party alone, a person there had asked me, “You came to the Christmas party alone?” “YES” was my solid answer with a very sweet smile. Not even taking it to heart. What was wrong with it anyways? If something is important to me, am I supposed to wait for The Significant Other to enter my life so I can do those things? Isn’t that a crazy mentality? Or even with something as little as buying flowers for myself, why the hell am I supposed to wait for the oh-so-magical human being to appear in front of me and bring me a bouquet of flowers. Our picture of how things are supposed to be is what screws us up. Always. And always. So one day I asked myself, why the hell are you waiting? What if it takes another 10 years for that magical person to appear? Are you gonna live your life depriving yourself of flowers? “NO” was the aloud answer this time.
Sometimes I think we are all just freaking crazy. So damn crazy that we don’t even know it ourselves. A freaking crazy human being running around wanting to be with absolutely anyone who loves them rather than being with their own self. Because omg, that is just so damn crazy! Alone? What would people think? How would I go here and there? Who would I do this and that with? When the answer to all of these questions is “Yourself!!!”
Seriously, if you wait for someone to start living your life, you are currently not living your life. You are waiting for a person to enter your life so you can finally start living your life. Does that make any sense at all? And what if that person finally arrives and your relationship doesn’t turn out to be the way you had imagined? What if he doesn’t even like to go out or buy you flowers? Then what? You wasted your life waiting for someone and now you’ll waste it expecting that someone to fulfill your desires. If you don’t have the strength to fulfill your own dreams, why do you expect someone else to do that for you? Why? The truth of life, whether you accept it or run away from it is that even if you have someone beside you, you are gonna have to learn to get up yourself and do the things that are important to you. People can only shield you so much. Eventually, they will get tired because you are not willing to stand up on your two feet, which by the way have been given to every single human being on this planet. If you are not able to convince yourself to stand up on those 2 feet because you are so damn convinced that nothing is going to work out, then you only have yourself to blame, not someone else. Because you are the reason you cannot get up and walk. You are the reason you are stuck in one place.
Society is a place that is as useful as it is harmful. It tells us the expectations but it doesn’t tell us how to break free from them. For once, try to stand away from what you think and what you think other people are thinking about you. Then you might be able to find who you are. If you are single, your brain will continue to convince you that you shouldn’t be and so will society. But in all of this chaos, what is the right thing for you? Can you hear that voice from your heart or is everything just way too loud in your head? No matter what the situation, as long as your head is extremely loud and you keep believing every single thing it says, you will never be able to see what’s right for you. The rules don’t matter; they are barely guidelines. They don’t work in every person’s life situation. You have to find your own way regardless of them. So if today you are single and are happy there, stay single and in love with your life. And if you are in a relationship, stay hooked and in love with not only your partner but most importantly, yourself. If you don’t love who you are, it doesn’t matter whether you are single or in a relationship, you will feel like trash every single day. In order to meet yourself and the love residing within you, you are gonna have to stop believing everything your brain is saying. You are gonna have to turn the volume down so you can hear what your heart is saying. Only your heart knows where you want to go; your brain does not. It does not know a freaking single thing!
Ish Kish Mish